Singer Sophie Ellis-Bextor bravely admits she was raped as a teenager

Sophie Ellis-Bextor speaks for the first time about her rape as a teenager in her forthcoming memoir, Spinning Plates.

The singer shared an excerpt from her book with DailyMail, revealing that she lost her virginity at the age of 17 when she was sexually assaulted by an older musician. She did not name her alleged attacker, who was 29 at the time.

Sophie, now 42, says she talks about her rape to give her younger self a “voice.”

In the clip, the Murder on the Dance Floor singer explains that she met the musician at a gig. The two began talking about their shared interest in history, which she was studying as part of her A-levels, and he later invited her to his home to look at some of his history books. “(The man) and I started kissing and before I knew it we were on his bed and he was pulling my panties off,” she said. “I heard myself saying ‘no’ and ‘I don’t want to’ but it didn’t make any difference.”

Sophie continued: “He didn’t listen to me and he had sex with me and I was so ashamed. That’s how I lost my virginity and I felt stupid. I remember staring at (the man’s) bookshelves and thinking: I just have to let this happen now.”

“After it was over, I lay in bed feeling strange, trying to process what had just happened. He fell asleep and I slept too, not really knowing how I was going to get home in the middle of the night,” she wrote in her memoir. “I woke up after a short while and remember angrily picking up my clothes from the floor and telling myself, ‘I said no.'”

Sophie added: “On the way home I wondered if everyone else on the tube could tell what had happened to me. I felt grubby but also unsure of my own feelings as I had no other experiences to compare it to.”

Sophie recalls the incident and admits that she did not report the rape because she did not believe she could sue the man. “Back then, the way rape was talked about had nothing to do with consent,” she explains. “Today, I am a mother of five young men and I introduce the concept of consent quite early on.”

Speaking about her decision to speak out about the ordeal, Sophie said: “I thought so much about why I wanted to write about it. I lead a happy life now and I wouldn’t say I felt overly traumatised at the time. Yet I feel that the culture that surrounded me – the things I saw and read and the way sex was talked about – made me believe I didn’t have a case.”

She continued: “The older I got, the more outrageous it seemed to me that a 29-year-old man would ignore me as a 17-year-old.”

Sophie’s memoir, Spinning Plates, will be published on October 7.

For help with the issues covered in this article visit: Rape Crisis England & Wales, Rape Crisis Scotland or The Rowan (for Northern Ireland). RASASC provides emotional and practical support for survivors, families and friends. For further support with mental health issues visit Mind.

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