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Dr. Ruth, renowned sex therapist and Holocaust survivor, dies at the age of 96

Therapist Ruth Westheimer, who died at the age of 96, dealt with problems of sexual performance in her radio show “Sexually Speaking”.
Donna Svennevik/Getty Images

  • Dr. Ruth Westheimer, an internationally renowned sex therapist, has died at the age of 96.
  • Westheimer was born in Germany to Jewish parents and escaped the Holocaust as a child. She never saw her parents again.
  • Westheimer became known in the 1980s for her frank sex advice and good-natured manner on her radio show “Sexually Speaking.”

Dr. Ruth Westheimer, a renowned sex therapist, media personality and Holocaust survivor who was known for her entertaining and culture-changing talks about sexual health and pleasure, has died at the age of 96, several media outlets reported.

Westheimer died at her home in New York on Friday, her publicist Pierre Lehu told the Associated Press.

In the 1980s, Westheimer gained international fame and admiration for her frank discussions about sex, first on her New York radio show “Sexually Speaking” and later on her talk show “Good Sex with Dr. Ruth Westheimer.”

At a time when discussing sexual health was considered taboo in the mainstream media, Westheimer, a petite but unapologetic woman, became known for her informative approach to sex education. Known to her fans as “Dr. Ruth,” Westheimer extolled the benefits of sex even in the final years of her life.

“Talking about sex from morning to night! That keeps you young,” Westheimer told People magazine in an interview on June 4, the day of her 95th birthday.

Westheimer, a Jewish orphan, became a psychologist despite all adversities

Westheimer was born Karola Ruth Siegel in Germany and lived with her parents and grandmother in Frankfurt, where she grew up baking and attending weekly Jewish services at the local synagogue, Insider previously reported.

But it all ended in 1938 when her family was separated during Nazi raids. She never saw her father, mother or grandmother again.

After an uprising in which 91 Jews died, Westheimer’s parents sent her to an orphanage in Switzerland along with 300 other Jewish German children as part of a protection system called the Kindertransport.

“They gave me life twice,” Westheimer told BILD am Sonntag about her parents. “The first time when I was born. And the second time when they sent me on the Kindertransport.”

Soon after her departure, Westheimer’s family was taken by the Nazis to concentration camps via Kindertransport. Her father and grandmother died due to the inhumane conditions, while her mother was reported missing.

Julius Siegel, pictured above, was the father of Dr. Ruth Westheimer, who was born Karola Ruth Siegel in Germany.
Courtesy of Dr. Ruth Westheimer

“I don’t consider myself a survivor. I consider myself an orphan of the Holocaust,” Westheimer said in “Ask Dr. Ruth,” a 2019 documentary about her life.

With only the contents of a suitcase and a handful of letters and pictures from her family, Westheimer emigrated to British-controlled Mandate Palestine on September 8, 1945, where she began a career as a sniper in the Israeli military. During her government-mandated career there, she never shot anyone, but recovered on her 20th birthday from shrapnel wounds to her legs sustained in an explosion.

Two years later, Westheimer moved to Paris with her first husband, an Israeli soldier, and began studying psychology at the Sorbonne. She worked as a kindergarten teacher to finance her education and became a professor at the University of Paris before moving to the United States in 1956.

Once in Manhattan, Westheimer devoted all her energy to earning a master’s degree in sociology from the New School and then a doctorate in education from Columbia University. She worked at Planned Parenthood and then at New York-Presbyterian Hospital, and spent her time educating others about sex.

Throughout all of this, Westheimer was also working on her personal life. She divorced her first husband, married another, and divorced again before finally finding her third and final husband, Manfred “Fred” Westheimer, at age 32. Fred was another Holocaust survivor and ski enthusiast, and Westheimer referred to their relationship as her “real marriage.”

Together they had a son, Joel, and Fred adopted Miriam, Westheimer’s daughter from a previous marriage.

Westheimer spent her career breaking sexual taboos

Westheimer was one of the first hosts to speak openly about sex and sexual health, incorporating words like “erectile dysfunction,” “vagina,” and “penis” into her shows.

On the 1980s radio show “Sexually Speaking,” New Yorkers would call in and ask Westheimer for help in solving their sexual problems. No matter what the topic – clitoral stimulation, masturbation, or sexual attraction to peanut butter – Westheimer always responded earnestly and with an unmistakable mix of conviction and good nature that made her known as one of America’s most trusted sex educators.

“I think sexual activity should be fun and human,” Westheimer said in a 1982 interview with David Letterman on his talk show.

Sex therapist Dr. Ruth Westheimer at the benefit gala for World AIDS Day on November 30, 1990 in New York City.
Arnaldo Magnani/Contact/Getty Images

Her episodes also challenged the taboos and stereotypes surrounding pleasure at the time. Westheimer spoke about the benefits of female masturbation and discussed sex between homosexuals, something that was unheard of in the mainstream media at the time.

An advocate of fulfilling sexuality and love at any age

Dr. Ruth Westheimer has died at the age of 96.
Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images

Westheimer led by example, helping others envision and build fulfilling lives despite unimaginable hardships. Even in her final years, she remained committed to the pursuit of sexual pleasure.

In an interview with People magazine on the occasion of her 94th birthday in June 2022, Westheimer shared words she believes we should live by: “Make sure not to put off your sex life as you get older. Make sure to keep it alive.”

That same year, she published a revised edition of her book The Art of Arousal, a collection of paintings, sculptures and drawings depicting eroticism throughout history.

In 2019, Westheimer told NPR’s Scott Simon that she wanted to put her difficult childhood behind her and avoided answering questions about it except for her documentary, preferring to focus on what she considered the two greatest accomplishments of her life: teaching sex education and being a mother and grandmother.

“And you, people of NPR, say it loud and clear: Hitler is dead and my four grandchildren are having fantastic lives,” she said.