Gen Z Sex Expert for Sexual Self-Care and Wellness

Welcome to your new safe space and Hypebae’s first-ever sex and dating column, Ask an Expert. This new weekly series is hosted by Haitian-Chinese, LA-based sexpert Gigi Fong, our in-house sex and dating editor.

A former sex worker, boudoir artist, and podcaster who now provides safe spaces for the hypebae community, Gigi specializes in all things sex-positive, from unconventional dating to fun for lovers of all identities. To get answers to your questions, visit our Dropbox below and ASend your confidential requests anonymously ♡

“What is sexual self-care?”

Hey darling! Great question for So many reasons. When people think of self-care and self-respect, they often assume that it can’t be accompanied by sex. After all, society teaches us that self-respect can only be shown in conservative ways, such as abstinence. However, self-care and self-respect should reflect your true needs and desires. Whether you choose abstinence or casual sex, you are exercising your right to choose. There’s obviously more to it than that, so let’s dive right in!

Sexual self-care is exactly what it sounds like: taking care of yourself, but most importantly, considering your sexuality. When conversations about self-care began to dominate during the pandemic, it was mostly about mental well-being. But as we soon learned, it’s also important to consider sexuality. Today, it seems like a given, but as discussed above, sex is considered taboo, which doesn’t leave much room for authentic expression.

There are a few things you can do to practice self-care. A good place to start is to develop a routine for your sexual well-being. For example, make sure you masturbate weekly to relieve stress – and have a good fuck with your partner every now and then to physically touch. This was a major key for many women like me after the overturning of the Roe v. Wade ruling that stripped us of our reproductive rights.

However, you can prioritize however your heart desires. However, a key element of sexual self-care is getting tested regularly for sexually transmitted infections. If you are sexually active, this can help protect not only yourself but your partner as well.

Need more advice? Here are three ways to practice sexual self-care.

Write a diary. Daily meditation and journaling are great ways to stay in tune with your desires and sex life. During your first journaling session, ask yourself, “Do I feel empowered during sex?” and see where your mind takes you.

Do sports regularly. If you struggle with low sex drive or desire, you know how important it is to exercise. We know, it sucks. But exercise has a number of benefits for your sex life, such as increased blood flow, which can lead to more intense orgasms. It also increases stamina and enables positions like cowgirl, much more satisfying. And finally, exercise also helps you build a connection with your body and increase your confidence.

Get tested regularly.

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