WNY native finds his true self as he blazes a trail for others in the soccer community

BUFFALO, N.Y. (WKBW) — If you or someone you know plays football in Western New York, there’s a good chance you’ve seen Wheatfield native John Netter.

For years, Netter has been a fixture in the soccer community, refereeing games at all levels, coaching youth and playing for several indoor and outdoor teams.

“In Buffalo, if you play football, you know John,” said FC Buffalo owner Nick Mendola.

“Even though he wasn’t playing, coaching or officiating, he was working at the Sportsplex or doing something that had to do with football,” said his longtime friend Trevor Lawler.

These days, Netter is the goalkeeping coach at FC Buffalo. This is his first season as the team’s coach, but he also played for Buffalo’s premier soccer club several years ago. Football has been his life, and it’s the first word I associate with someone I’ve known and called friend since elementary school.

Credit: John Netter

Bové: When I think of you, the first thing I think of is football… is that weird?

“No, because I would probably say the same thing about myself…and I think for a while when I was thinking about things, I think I just made up these scenarios of what people would think me would be a different word,” says Netter.

The word Netter is referring to is something he kept secret for several years. But that changed in July last year with an Instagram post in which he came out, or in his words “let them in”.

“I just thought if I ever came out, and I did, I just thought people would make that my identity, and I think it’s because when I was younger, I did other people’s identities, I just tried to hide from it to the point where you turned it almost 360 degrees,” Netter said.

Netter shared his story and immediately received support from his peers in the soccer community. It was rewarding but it made him wish he had shared his story sooner.

“In my head, I think it’s still weird that no one thinks it’s weird,” Netter said. “But I think it’s because of the way it was when I was younger. I didn’t have a lot of representation, like I didn’t have anyone that I saw, in the football community or sport, who was gay and like me.”

This idea of ​​representation is why John is now sharing his story. He wants to help someone in a similar situation to the one he was in not long ago. He knows that representation is important, especially within the LGBTQ+ community.

“I think for guys especially it’s still a bit taboo, it’s getting better, but if a guy isn’t doing well it’s ‘well man, it’s oh, be a man’ , and all that kind of stuff,” Netter said. “I think it eats away at people who aren’t comfortable or don’t have the circle around them that they need.”

Netter benefits from this circle and the support of his friends and family. That’s not the case for everyone, which is why he believes stories like this are important.

“It’s interesting to me that someone as confident, I just want to use the word confident, as self-assured as John was somehow going through something that left him feeling uncertain,” added Mendola.

“I’m very proud of the fact that he’s willing to lead by example and show himself,” Lawler said. “Because it’s not an easy thing to do, it’s not an easy thing to do.”

It wasn’t easy, but it was worth it. John found his true self and people who shared the same love for football continued to support him. He is grateful and hopes his story can make a difference, even for just one person.

“If I had someone like me when I was younger, and I wasn’t saying my role models weren’t great when I was younger, but that’s just not anyone I can be around. identify myself. I didn’t have anyone who was gay, he was a guy who really loved sports and was so involved in something he loved. That’s where I was, like if I could help one person with this today, it would make up for it. I agree with that,” Netter said.