The future of sex | Psychology today

Sex technology is advancing at an astonishing rate and promises to revolutionize intimacy. Chatbots, avatars, sex dolls, and VR porn are some examples of advanced sex technology that are already gaining traction—and this is just the beginning. Intimacy is at the core of humanity, yet the way we are intimate is changing rapidly.

How future humans behave emotionally and sexually is now being dictated by technology companies. This is not necessarily a bad thing, as human intimacy is far from perfect. People today have significant problems with their romantic relationships. It is to be hoped that innovative sex technology will help make the future of intimacy less stressful and more enjoyable. However, there is also the risk of negative effects. For at least part of the population, sex technology will become a convincing, if unhelpful, intimate partner.

Still, it’s easy to downplay the impact of technology on sex and the future of intimacy. First, we already have a lot to worry about. The news alerts us to problems around the world, so our bandwidth for further worry may be limited. On top of that, the future is uncertain. It’s much easier to focus on reality than to dwell on the unknown. I’ve found that people tend to justify their lack of concern about the impact of sex technology with one of four statements:

“Humans will always prefer human partners.”

Even if that were the case—and I don’t think it’s a given—it doesn’t mean people would reject sex technology and wait for a potentially elusive but preferred human partner. We’re a species that needs connection but values ​​convenience and efficiency at the same time. Advanced sex technology can do many things more efficiently and quickly than a human partner. For example, a better, faster orgasm, a less emotionally needy sexting partner, a perfect-looking body, technology that accepts your preferences instead of being disgusted by them.

Furthermore, not all humans are great lovers, and not everyone has the opportunity to have a human sexual partner. So just because a human partner may remain the gold standard doesn’t mean that people will always choose humans over sex technology, or that a potential partner is more desirable than sex technology simply because they’re human.

“I don’t find the new technology sexually attractive, so others won’t be either.”

People often mistakenly assume that others’ opinions largely reflect their own. But what makes great sex is a unique experience. Additionally, research consistently suggests that younger generations find advanced sex technology more attractive than older generations. This is understandable, as younger generations are used to interacting with technology in all aspects of their lives.

Finally, and very importantly, the human brain is neuroplastic, meaning it is changed by experience. Neuroplasticity is enhanced during infancy and again in early adolescence—a time when many young people are first exposed to sex technology (Pizzol et al., 2016). Because their young brains are being rewired in response to this sexual stimulation (Brown & Wisco, 2019), it is likely that their perspective on sex technology as adults will be different than that of someone whose brain was not altered by such technology as a young adult.

“The technology is not there yet. It is simply not as powerful.”

Sex robots do not exist in any convincing form today, but it is really unclear how long that will remain the case. Technology is making great advances in a relatively short period of time. For example, it took less than two years for smartphones to become desirable objects. Likewise, the porn scene on the World Wide Web exploded within a year of the Internet becoming accessible. Things change quickly, and improvements happen quickly.

“New inventions are always accompanied by hype, such as the printing press, but people’s worst fears never come true.”

This concept is rapidly becoming obsolete. Sex technology, unlike the printing press, satisfies complex and primal human needs in ways that human lovers cannot always match. Moreover, AI is rapidly gaining intelligence. Our confidence that we can determine our future by looking at our past is no longer tenable. The future of humanity depends on our ability to think clearly in new situations and do what we do best: respond logically and humanely. We are living through a unique moment in history. Change is happening faster than ever before, as all aspects of our lives are being transformed.

Go forward

While we are excited about the exciting evolution of technology, we should also be aware that sex technology has a lot of potential and will impact the future of intimacy, likely in both positive and negative ways. Rather than wait and see how this adventure unfolds, I suggest we take a proactive approach to supporting the most vulnerable among us in this transformation.

For example, I am very concerned about the impact of VR porn on adolescents’ experiences of intimacy and sex. I am also concerned about the impact of this technology on emotionally fragile people. For example, how will they deal with data leaks of highly personal, sexual information (Yang et al., 2023), limited access to a beloved artificial companion, deep fake porn (Flynn et al., 2022), and the many other legal and ethical challenges that lie ahead.

Stay tuned as I explore these topics in the coming months. But for now, let’s be clear that intimacy is not a game and sex technology is powerful. We will better serve the people of the future if we engage more in dialogue about the future of intimacy now.

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